‘Say thank you…’ is a mantra that parents and children know all too well. We learn from a very early age that gratitude opens doors. Saying thank you means realising our interconnectedness, our shared experience of life. The intention behind the words crosses the barriers of language and culture, allowing us to make a connection even when we are tongue-tied and grasping for the words to convey our thoughts.
‘Practicing mindfulness of gratitude consistently leads to a direct experience of being connected to life and the realization that there is a larger context in which your personal story is unfolding.’ ~ Phillip Moffitt
The Latin word ‘gratia’, meaning kindness or favour, is at the heart of gratitude – the acknowledgement of all the ways in which we are touched by grace. Gratitude is both a feeling and a spiritual practice. We can increase our capacity for gratitude by making a deliberate point of noticing the good things in our lives, however small or trivial they may seem. This practice can help us to find emotional balance. After all, the negative experiences in our lives also come in many shapes and sizes.
On an energetic level, the quality of gratitude resides at Anahata chakra (the heart centre), and it is not uncommon for us to physically touch our heart centre when we express our feelings of thankfulness. We increase the positive energy at Anahata chakra each time we acknowledge a blessing or a kind deed someone has done for us. What’s more, this positive effect also extends to those receiving our gratitude.
One of the barriers to the practising gratitude is the perception that we have no time to stop and acknowledge the things that have a positive impact on our existence. In fact we get so busy sometimes that the things that make our lives more wonderful might even be taken for granted. Stepping outside of our daily routine can provide the perspective we need to notice them, so a holiday can provide a great opportunity for renewing, or kick- starting, a gratitude practice.
I have just returned from a trip to Japan, where I spent a couple of weeks visiting my son Sean, who is attending a college in Kyoto for one year. Life was very busy in the weeks leading up to my departure, so I did not have much time to prepare for my trip. If I had had more time, I would have attempted to learn some Japanese before I departed, however I did at least know how to say thank you – ‘arigato gozaimasu’!
Since Sean had to be at school on the morning I arrived, I was welcomed at the airport by his host family. Mrs. Yabu was holding up a sign with my name on it. I soon discovered that her grasp of English more or less matched my understanding of Japanese! We hugged each other awkwardly, and I uttered the first of many ‘arigato gozaimasu-s’… She responded with a warm smile, and a door opened between us.
My trip to Japan presented many opportunities to feel grateful. I truly appreciate the support of my fellow teachers, which meant that all my classes were covered while I was traveling. It was wonderful to know that the students would be well taken care of in my absence, and that the studio was in good hands.
It didn’t take long to find out just how much the Yabu family has opened their home and their hearts to my son, and in doing so have made it possible for him to really be himself in his new surroundings. It was also evident that his presence in their household has given them reasons to be thankful. He is a generous and positive person, who brings a fresh perspective on their culture and his cheeky sense of humour seems to have translated easily into their language. It was truly heart-warming to see how much they have all gained from this cultural exchange.
The Yabu family received many heartfelt thanks from me for being enthusiastic tour guides as we explored the temples and shrines of Kyoto in the stifling summer heat! Mr. Yabu never tired in his attempts to explain the history and meaning behind the amazing architecture and symbolism of the sites we visited. (This is probably also an appropriate time to give thanks for the iPhone translation application, which helped us communicate when the going got tough!) Each day ended with an elaborate meal prepared by Mrs. Yabu, who wanted to make sure that I had tried all the local favourites by the time I left Kyoto.
It was wonderful to spend time with Sean, and to let him take care of me in a strange environment. He became a tireless interpreter for the two weeks I was there. His open and honest sharing of his experiences in Japan made me realise once more how lucky I am to have such a close relationship with him.
One of the unexpected things I am grateful for is the fact that I had so little time to prepare for this trip. Not knowing the language, and having little or no agenda for my time in Kyoto, meant that I relied on others for support and guidance. Letting them take care of me turned out to be a wonderful experience!
Since my return, I have had reason to be grateful for many things, including my safe journey home, my comfortable bed, my spacious yoga room, the chance to reconnect with friends and family. I’m grateful too for familiar food and decent coffee.
Like I said, a holiday can provide wonderful opportunities for developing gratitude. The challenge is to continue this practice once we find ourselves back in the midst of everyday life. In the words of Pema Chodron – ‘The ordinariness of our good fortune can make it hard to catch.’ So we have to make an effort to notice our blessings when life is more mundane. Perhaps the things we think of as ordinary can become extraordinary if we see them as opportunities to open our hearts.
Om shanti.
~ Lynda Miers-Henneveld.
